Mom to Mom // 04

It's #momtomom time, and I am thrilled for you to meet Cristal. She is a momma who tells it like it is, with so much love in her heart it is unreal. (oh, and i am pretty obsessed with how naturally beautiful she is.) Her daughter is something I will not even attempt to describe because, honestly, she is perfection with a huge helping of major cuteness. I could just cuddle and play with Mia for hours. (if i ever got the chance to meet her off of instagram that is, ha.) 

So honored and flattered to bring this momma into your lives if you haven't already met her. So without further ado, here is the beautiful Cristal!

Before reading this- this is my personal life and opinion and I do not wish to offend anyone, there is no right choice between been a working mom or a stay at home mom. Remember, we all have our story…

The day I realized I was a stay at home mom, I was in the kitchen making myself some coffee and asked myself, what I’m I going to do today? I had recently stopped working because my work schedule was interfering with the husband’s work/army schedule. We were taking care of Mia ourselves, and most days I had to call out because he had to go to base.

That day, I prepared Mia’s home made baby food, made myself breakfast, cleaned up the house a bit, went to the grocery store and had dinner sort of ready by 6pm, which is the time the husband gets home from work. That night while brushing my teeth I looked at myself in the mirror, I had dark circles under my eyes, my hair was messy and my shirt was full of spit up, I was also very tired. I was a mom, a stay at home mom, like those on TV but without the pretty A-line dresses and the nice hair. I was 22 years old and had a husband and a baby to take care of.

 I haven’t finished college and today someone told me that was ok, that I shouldn’t be so hard on myself. I’m doing the biggest possible job in the world and I should be proud of myself. I want to believe that, but I am the only woman in my family with a baby and without a college degree. I sign up for school last semester and I will admit it, I made up an excuse not to go because I didn’t want to leave Mia in a daycare and at this point we cannot afford a nanny. I sign up for school for the upcoming semester and last month I walked into 10 daycares but couldn’t find the strength to fill out the paper work at any of them and say yes, she will start Monday.  No one will take care of my daughter like I do. How can you be a good mom and still be successful? I’ve seen people do it but nothing makes me happier than to watch my daughter every morning sitting on the kitchen floor or table eating a strawberry or a mango, the mess, I love it, cleaning it makes me happy. 

My mom did not raise my brother or me, things happen between her and my dad and they got separated. I was 2 years old and my brother was 6 months old when we moved in with my grandma (fathers side). She raised us and she has Alzheimer now and sometimes doesn’t even remember who I am. No one tells me stories from when I was a baby, not even my dad, he is a doctor so, he was never home. I want to be able to tell Mia the things she used to do when she was a kid, tell her about the time she crawled or walked, the time she pooped and her diaper didn’t hold it and there was poop all over the bedroom floor, but for that I have to be there for her and I want to be there with her.

I never planned to be a stay at home mom, but now that I’ve become one, how do you go back to the “adult world”? Is a question that I ask myself every day! There are things in life that I want to accomplish and I know, eventually I’ll get myself together and will allowed myself to trust people with my daughter, but today I’m fine with been a 22 years old stay at home mom without a college degree because the minutes, hours and days with my daughter are priceless.